We had it out. For 2 hours we had it out. Janet (my step mom), dad, and me. We sat on the couch in the living room. In a sort of triangle. All of us atleast 15 feet apart. Janet puffed with anger, Dad sitting hunched over his hands clasped together and his elbows supporting his weight at the the knee, me with my arms crossed and legs bent up to my chest crying harder than I believe I ever had before. I could go into the details over the conversation. What was said and when. Who said it and how. The tears that followed. The yelling that followed that. But I won't. I'll generalize. The conversation began with Janet accusing my mom of skipping the "meeting" they only invited me to. Then her attacing my mom. Me yelling at her to stop and then dad realiseing she had stepped to far quieted her. In the middle I brought up what dad said at the diner and the gas trip almost a year prior. It ended with me telling my dad I was sorry I got into a wreck (the whole reason for the "meeting") but I'd be honest I was glad it happened because we had talked more in the past week than we had in almost a year. In the middle was my asthma attack from crying so hard and maybe a bit of an anxiety attack. And the end was dad handing me the car keys to a new car. A car that I hate . And I shouldn't I should be greatful for it but all the same I know they bought it to resent me. But people do that. They do that. And maybe they won't anymore.

There were so many other things said. There were so many more tears. And maybe I should talk about them. But I won't because I would like to believe that is past And now I'm trying to see the future.

kate